A day in the life of District Secretary for Attendance

Contributed by PP Eric Yap (Rotary Club of Port Klang)

Act 1

Scene 1

District Governor (DG) gets ready to get into his chauffer driven Kembara on his official Club visit to the clubs in the north. Once settled down comfortably in his plush half leather seat he opens up the latest issue of the Monthly Governors Newsletter and to his horror sees that not all clubs in his district submits their attendance report. DG picks up his latest Maki-a mobile and calls the District Secretary for Attendance (DSA).

DG: District Secretary for Attendance (DSA), how is the attendance report coming from the clubs?

DSA: Er…DG generally all clubs are ok… it is the 15th of the month but there is still some clubs who has yet to submit their reports.

DG: Tell me who they are and I will call the President personally

DSA: Clubs A, B & C have yet to submit.

DG: OK thanks……. (and hang up his mobile)


Act 2

Scene 1

DG calls up the President of Club A from his mobile along the NS Highway.

DG: Hello, President A (PA) this is District Governor DG. How are you? And how is you club coming along?

PA: Good Morning DG, fine…fine…how are you? The phone reception is not so good

DG: Ya…ya….I am on the NS Highway to visit Club Z. Have your club submitted the attendance report to DSA?
PA: Of Course. We submit promptly every month. The Club has a very efficient secretary.

DG OK ,…good. But I heard from DSA that for this month your club has not submitted its report.

PA: Is that so? Impossible!! Let me check and get back to you?


Scene 2

President A calls Club Secretary A and ask whether the report has been submitted to the DSA. Club Secretary says that he has, as usual submitted promptly by the 10th of the month

Right after Club Secretary A puts down his fixed line phone, his mobile rings and the DSA is on the line.

DSA: Hello PP Club Secretary A (a past president), this is DSA. Have you submitted your attendance report for last month?

CSA: Er… no, not yet. You know lah very busy what with work and sending children all over. This is a voluntary matter. Got time submit lah, no time later lah. Sometimes I give you 3 month attendance (in one go) what. OK want lah don’t worry


Act 3

Scene 1

DG calls up the President of Club B from his mobile. Now he stops at the rest area for toilet call.

DG: Hello, President B (PB) this is District Governor DG. How are you? And how is you club coming along?

PB: Good Morning DG, fine…fine…how are you?

DG: OK on my way to visit Club Z. Have your club submitted the attendance report to DSA?

PB: I am not sure. I need to check with the secretary, anything else?

DG: I heard from DSA that your club has not submitted its report for last month’s attendance.

PB: Let me check and get back to you?


Scene 2

President B calls Club Secretary B and ask whether the report has been submitted to the DSA. Club Secretary B says that he has. Right after club secretary puts down his fixed line phone his mobile rings and the DSA is on the line.

DSA: Hello Club Secretary B, this is DSA. Have you send a copy of your attendance report for last month? I don’t remember receiving it.

CSB: I have already email to you what. Never receive ah. Ok Ok I will email again later You know lah all this email sometimes my mail also go missing very teruk lah.


Scene 3

DSA finally receive the report from Club Secretary B 5 days later…by fax.


Act 4

Scene 1

DG calls up the President of Club C (PC) from his mobile. He is on the road again

DG: Hello, President C this is District Governor DG. How are you? And how is your club coming along?

PC: Good Morning DG, fine…fine…how are you?

DG: Have your club submitted the attendance report to DSA?

PC: I am not sure. I need to check with the secretary, anything else?

DG: I heard from DSA that for this month your club has not submitted its report.

PC: Let me check and get back to you?


Scene 2

President C calls Club Secretary C and ask whether the report has been submitted to the DSA. Club Secretary says that he has. Right after club secretary puts down his phone his mobile rings and the DSA is on the line.

DSA: Hello Secretary C, this is DSA. Can you send a copy of your attendance report for last month? I don’t remember receiving it.

CSC: I don’t know I missed the last few meeting. Didn’t the President C send it to you? Let me check and get back to you.

DSA is still waiting, not knowing whether President C or Secretary C will send the report.

P/S: For the info of Rotaractors, the DG has to submit the attendance report to RI (for compilation and statistical purposes on the performance of the district). The characters potrayed is fictional and any reference to any particular individual (dead or alive) is purely unintentional.

Interesting Fact: Obesity is a condition in which the natural energy reserve, stored in the fatty tissue of humans and mammals is increased to a point where it is thought to be a significant risk factor in certain health conditions, leading to increased mortality. Obesity is relatively rare among animals in the wild, but it is common in domestic animals (who may be overfed and underexercised), and increasingly in humans.