You ini tak pernah belajar ke?

Contributed by PE Lloyd Cheam

Out of my normal boring working days, something happened… I should say quite extra ordinary. It was during a normal night, while I was catching up on some works and working overtime. I went back for a change so I could get more comfortable since my office it just close by to my place.

Quickly, I had my dinner and changed into casual short and t-shirt, and come back to the office to continue to start working. Arrived in front of the office, I can’t find any empty parking slot. However, I spotted something familiar, an old grey colour 1980’s 200 Series Mercedes. I thought to myself that is my dad’s car. Without thinking twice, I parked my Isuzu Trooper right behind it and went into the office.

While I was into my works, talking to my colleague about the current project, about this and that, someone came knocking on our office glass door. My colleague, who sits near the door, saw the person is pointing at something in front of our office. Subconsciously, he knew it should be some vehicles blocking other vehicles as it is common for shop houses like ours to be cramped up with many vehicles.

Immediately, I thought of my vehicle. I wondered why my dad doesn’t come in himself and let me know. As soon as I got out, I find out why. I saw a Malay guy, who is as tall as me and slightly muscular, leaning on my vehicle. He had a cigarette in his mouth and looks pretty calm. I realized the car I block isn’t my dad’s and it’s someone else. I felt sorry right away. It happened to be the same model, same colour and about the same age too, I guess.

I tried my luck by smiling to him as soon as our eyes contact, lifted my hand and to gesture a ‘sorry’. Out of all my expectations, the Malay guy started a rampage, saying, “Mengapa you orang suka bagi orang lain trouble?” in Malay mixing with English. (Direct translation - “Why you people like to give other people troubles?”) As he said this, he raises his voice and becoming more provoking. He continued to question me about the same issue that I blocked his car. He continued, “Why you people here is so inconsiderate?”, “Why you people here like to do this?”

He was leaning and standing in front of my vehicle. The reproaching carried on like this for a minute or so, long enough that I have had enough of him. While he was bitching out, he actually moves closer to block my way to make sure that I would take up all his abuses. With his high pitch and his body language, it was obvious that he is suggesting for a fight.

There were many things going through my mind at the moment. Should I throw him a punch and whack him with my golf club? But I might end in jail that night. Or, should I provoke him more to get a punch from him and make a police report, so I have proof to get him into jail? But I definitely hate to have a broken nose. Well, either way is not what I wanted because I will not get to finish my work which is due tomorrow 7am!

So, what I really did was put up both of my arms crossed in front of my chest, looking at him emotionlessly, at least as emotionlessly as possible. To be frank, with pissed off face too. Crossing my arms meant that I did not want to fight him at all. Still, he was reluctant to let me go off easily. He threw a question and asks, “You ini, tak pernah belajar ke?” (Direct Translation – “You this, never study?”)

After all these years that my parents have spent on me in schools and universities, I kept quiet. Then I shook my head indicating, “Yeah, you might be pretty right” and raise my shoulder giving the “I don’t know, do you really believe?” look. Then he threw his best English, “So you now, get the hell out here!!” (Strategically missing the ‘of’ word).

Seeing him finally moving out of the way, I walk to my vehicle disgustedly and move it away. Of course, I didn’t throw him a punch, though I really wanted to. When I was in my car, I saw passer-by nearby walk away disappointedly. I guess he has witnessed the whole drama and was hopeful of a great street fight. I sure hope he is standing at my side.

When I entered back into the office, I feel a cold sting running through my back. As though I had just taken a Roller Coaster ride, or have just recovered from a Bungee Jump. I was not frightened but simply in a disbelief stage. I just could not believe I am honoured to meet such a big axxhole.

Whether if it is me that should not have blocked his vehicle or he could have expressed his need to get out there more pleasantly (maybe his car’s honk was not working that night). What he did was simply immature and low class. I have to admit it only takes another immature and low class fool to fight him back.

Well, fortunately, that night carried on quietly with me finishing my works back in the office.